Women in Abusive Relationships
Maybe you’re a housewife who’s being knocked about by an angry husband. Maybe you’re a teenager with bruises on your forearms from where your boyfriend grabbed you. Maybe you’re in a relationship with a guy who’s really great except that when he gets mad he does any of the following:
- slaps you
- throws things at you
- pulls your hair
- pushes you
- pinches you
- kicks you
Maybe you’re wondering if it’s really abuse. Is it really abuse if he just throws things toward you and not at you? Is it abuse if he only uses the back of his hand to slap you? Is it abuse if you slapped him first? Is it abuse if he only does it when he’s drunk, angry, having a bad day, when you burnt dinner or forgot to wash the dishes? Is it abuse if he doesn’t leave bruises or marks? Is it abuse if you started the argument? Is it abuse if he pushes you but you don’t fall? Is it really abuse?
It is, and deep inside, you know it. If you even have to ask yourself “is it abuse” then the answer is “yes.”
For god’s sake, please get out. If you don’t have any money, call every single friend and family member you have to get a place to stay, somewhere you can get back on your feet. If you’ve got kids, call a county social worker and explain the situation. Call the police. Police do not take kindly to domestic violence. If you’re afraid of being alone, be more afraid of what will happen to you if you stay. Most women who are killed are killed by someone they know.
Don’t think it could happen to you? Nicole Simpson probably didn’t think so, either.
And what’s worse than dying at the hands of an abusive man? Living with one. The shame, the degradation, the shattering of your self-worth leaves you nothing but a pile of bones. Living with an abusive man (no matter how minor the abuse may seem) is no way to live.
Please – for yourself, for your friends, for your mom, for me — I beg you. Get out. Pull up that shred of dignity you still have somewhere inside of you, and get out as soon as you can.
Tags: Advice for Women
